T’is the night before Christmas … and Carrie and I are going to the mall.

It appears that she ordered something online, exchanged it, and has to go to the physical store to pick it up. (Or something else.. I usually get this wrong!) But you have to understand the absurdity of this… Aside from the fact it’s Christmas Eve, Carrie absolutely hates the mall. In fact, even if we go on a weekday in July, she’ll say, “Why are we going the weekend before Christmas? It’ll be BEDLAM!” She’s an Amazonian (in the shopping sense) through and through. Her favorite expression, when she hears that someone needs something, is “You’ll have it in an hour!”

I was watching the news last night, and the reporter was talking about the Christmas rush at local malls, and they cut to a shot at a mall that showed a few people walking around, but not what you would expect 24 hours before Christmas Eve. More like what you’d see on a weekday in July.

We all know the statistics — that more and more people are shopping online, and things like Black Friday and Cyber Monday deals kind of take the air out of holiday shopping in stores.

Well, call me a relic. I LOVE going to the mall. The music, the decorations, the lights… I dunno, it gives a me a Christmas rush — not bad for a Jewish guy, yet quite unlike the rush you get, say, from inhaling whippets! But I digress.

(As an aside, I am equally dismayed by the fact that most stores have aisles and aisles of Christmas wrapping paper, stocking stuffers, ornaments and all, and the Chanukah stuff is relegated to an end cap at the end of aisle 9. There are candles, menorahs and platters that say ‘Latkes’ on them. Oh, and big fuzzy Jewish stars that you don’t know if it’s a pillow or something to hang on the door. That’s it. And leave it to the supermarkets to fill their Chanukah end caps with matzo and gefilte fish.. which, as we all know, have NOTHING to do with Chanukah. They must think, “OK, it’s another Jewish holiday.. break out the fish balls!”)

In a way, I’m glad the malls aren’t as crowded as they used to be. I don’t have to wrestle with anyone to get the last XL half-zip sweater in blue that’s now on sale for 65% off! And, we can stroll more leisurely as we gaze at the storefront windows, and sip our coffees as we go.

Here’s to getting out and seeing people on the holidays. Merry Christmas (and Happy Chanukah) to all, and to all.. a good night!